Breaking News: Orientalist Dubai Dream Tour Shattered! (Part 3)

By Terry*
Continued from part 2 and part 1.
Anon continues:
* “The miracle of Dubai is also made possible by a largely invisible army of cheap labour: 90 per cent of the population are foreigners, including Western professionals lured by the black gold, but mainly Filipino maids and nannies, and construction workers from India, Pakistan and Bangladesh” and “Construction workers are paid a paltry US$100 a month and sleep in huge hostels, where 20 people share a single bathroom.”
Yes, those construction workers, waiters, maids, nannies and shop assistants I talked to every day for years were just a mirage. But the ‘invisible army’ and the mention of mistreatment of workers are obligatory in any story on Dubai that takes a negative stance. I’m starting to feel nostalgic for the old days when it was obligatory to mention the cruel Arabs and the five-year-old camel jockeys…

Workers’ conditions and living conditions for the underprivileged is an issue everywhere but If I write about New York restaurants, should I devote a paragraph to the illegal dishwashers from South America without health insurance who help keep America’s economy just above the waterline? Should I write about Maori alcohol and incarceration problems if I write about New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc? If I write about Outback Australia, should I always mention the ‘Aboriginal problem’? Is a travel story the place to talk about globalisation and the migration of workers looking for a better life and getting screwed? Sometimes. But if you’re going to do it, be balanced. Oh, and the last time I heard the term ‘black gold’ was on the Beverly Hillbillies theme song. Man, I love me some banjo. Can’t get the song out of my head now.

* “We also check out Little India, swarming with tourist tat touts and shops cluttered with cheap Chinese-made clothes and plastic utensils, which are what real people use”.
What sort of utensils do the people who aren’t real use and what do you have against utensils made of materials other than plastic? (Note: for those shopping for plastic utensils, the author probably means Karama Souq.)

* “Shindagha, the original site from which Dubai grew, is by the river mouth. Sheikh Saeed's house, the former home of the ruling Maktoum family, has been 'carefully restored' and is open to view.”
Why is carefully restored in inverted commas? Are those Arabs trying to trick Anon again with a ‘fake’ house and yet another fake experience? Is there nothing really authentic in Dubai? Not according to Anon.

* “Nearby, the Heritage and the Pearl Fishers' villages purport to offer a glimpse of traditional life - with credit card facilities.”
It’s actually ‘Heritage and Diving Villages’ and the author clearly didn’t visit during the frequent Emirati events (pictured), including traditional dances and singing, as well as our favourite, the rifle-throwing competitions – you don’t need a credit card for those, just for the ‘fake’ souvenirs. You also don’t need a credit card to buy the authentic breads and snacks made by ‘real’ local women, just some small change.

* “In fact, there are few historic buildings left standing. Between the corrosive elements of sun and wind, mud walls don't tend to last long and for the past few decades, Dubai's natives have been more enthusiastic about building comfortable, modern mansions than restoring mud huts.”
We’ll overlook the inaccuracies and horrid sentence construction, but damn those ‘natives’ wanting to live in comfortable, modern mansions when they could live in a ‘mud hut’ with no air-conditioning for the sake of not appearing ‘fake’ to a New Zealand ‘journalist’ who can’t even get his ‘facts’ straight. The cheek of them.

* “A dignified older man offers us dates and coffee spiced with cardamom.”
At last, the Wilfred Thesiger or Lawrence of Arabia moment that Anon has been looking for happens! Luckily, it wasn’t an ‘undignified’ older man that he met. I hear they’re not as friendly.

* “Hospitality is one of the most highly esteemed virtues in Islamic culture. The touching family scene straight out of centuries past is disrupted by the arrival of a giant SUV sending up clouds of sand. The other men of the family are arriving.”
Damn, just as Anon’s Orientalist dream – straight from ‘centuries past’ – is realised, it’s snatched away by ‘fake’ Arabs and their ‘fake’ 4WD’s. Don’t they know anything about authenticity, like, you know, white New Zealanders earnestly doing the Haka? By the way, it’s Arab (and especially Bedouin) hospitality that Anon might be thinking of and Islam is a religion.

* “When we recount our meeting later, our guide is quick to quell any romantic notions of traditional lifestyles surviving into the 21st century. It turns out Bedouin all live in the city these days, and drive to their estates at the weekend. "Camel caretakers", predominantly from Southeast Asia, are paid a pittance to do the actual day-to-day camel wrangling.”
Wow. Sounds like these tour guides are a real downer in Dubai. As soon as you think you’ve found something authentic – baaaaammmm – they’ll spoil it for you!

And so it turns out that the only ‘real’ moment of Anon’s Orientalist Dream Tour was fake as well.

* Terry Carter is my husband and co-writer.

Breaking News: Orientalist Dubai Dream Tour Shattered! (part 1)

By Terry Carter*
Dubai is still sizzling as a travel destination, no matter what part of the planet you look at it from. But let’s look at Dubai from an Australasian travel media perspective for a moment. Australian newspaper The Sydney Morning Herald and sister publication The Age love running stories on Dubai, but they've really run out of steam if their latest article is any indicator. But really, what should we expect from a once well regarded publisher that has a blog called ‘The Backpacker’ that explores themes such as 'Joining the Mile High Club', 'Travel cliches (sic): are they worth it?' and 'How to get rid of your backpacker'. Seriously. However, this latest anonymously authored story, which ran in New Zealand’s Dominion Post first, manages to set the bar to an all-time low, appearing like a package tour report that wouldn’t be out of place on TripAdvisor. The 'author' of the article has an odd preconception about Dubai from the start, but then feigns surprise when the destination doesn’t live up to his skewed expectations. So, what does he do? Call the story ‘Truth and Trickery in Dubai’. So, what's wrong with this story?

‘Anon’ as we’ll call the writer, is disappointed to learn the belly dancer on his desert safari is from Egypt, claiming she’s no more a Dubai local than he is (we’ll assume it’s a ‘he’). Last time I checked Egypt was in the Middle East and New Zealand wasn’t. We’re already off to a weird start. I don’t want to get into the much-contested origins of belly-dancing, but if you have an Egyptian belly-dancer in front of you, that’s a lot more authentic an experience than most visitors to any Middle East destination get these days. Even in Egypt itself (arguably the spiritual home of the dance), you’ll probably be confronted by the ‘fake’ shimmying of an Eastern European dancer if you go to an ‘Oriental’ show.

Anon then contradicts himself by saying it shouldn’t come as a surprise that the dancer isn’t a Dubai local as “one is lucky to see an ankle belonging to a local woman, let alone an exposed navel”. Actually, local women do a dance similar to the ‘belly-dance’, just not half-naked, not in public, not in front of men, and certainly not for creepy foreigners like Anon. So, let’s get this straight. He’s saying: the belly dancer is inauthentic because she’s from Egypt, Dubai women don’t do the belly dance, therefore Dubai=Fake. Or perhaps that makes it doubleFake? Can’t argue with logic like that.

To be honest, I debated whether to bother going further to deconstruct this article, but a story as misanthropic, sexist, and filled with thinly veiled racism as this (not to mention being published in such well-regarded newspapers), deserves it. So, let’s just get the attacks on the people that our fearless Orientalist comes across out of the way first. Here are some of Anon's choice quotes:
“…a pock-marked Bangladesh-born wide-boy”
“…one hapless male whose game attempts to mimic her pelvic thrusts are slightly impeded by his fluorescent bumbag and complete lack of coordination”
“…fat-bottomed tourists” and
“It is fun to get lost in the narrow alleyways of the gold and spice souks and get high on the heady mix of cloves, cardamom, incense and armpit.”

Clearly Anon dislikes acne, fluoro bumbags, people lacking dancing skills, fat-bottomed tourists, and people who don’t wear deodorant. I’m still trying to figure out why this is exclusive to Dubai. Really, did anyone edit this? But what Anon really dislikes is how ‘fake’ Dubai is. And he’s in Dubai to separate the truth from trickery.

But if Anon was ‘tricked’ about what to expect in Dubai, who deceived him, and what were his expectations? It’s clear – at least for the purposes of creating an angle for his story – he was expecting some sort of Orientalist fantasy of Bedouin goat-hair tents lining Dubai’s main thoroughfare Sheikh Zayed Road, where there’s a ten-lane camel highway (and perhaps a flying carpet lane as well?) leading to ARABIA, while the score from Lawrence of Arabia fills the air. However, Anon never sets out his expectations at the start of the story. Heaven forbid that would create a narrative! But here’s a hint as to where his desires lay: the belly-dancer is “an exotic apparition” before the spell is broken and he finds out she’s a ‘fake’ from Egypt.

And it gets worse... (read part 2 here.)

* Terry Carter is my partner and co-writer